When Your Teen Isn’t Concerned about Weight. The teenage years can be challenging, especially for a young girl who is overweight. Share page. Your teen may not be as concerned about her weight as you are. He recommended picking a calm time to talk and addressing the issue unemotionally. She may tune out your lectures about long-term health. Talk to your partner about it. How to Help Teens without Harming Them Don't say anything if she's lost weight. Sadly, you’re hardly alone if your child is worried about his or her body size. Like Mother, Like Daughter; Opening a conversation with your teen about weight and health can be difficult – these resources will get you started! Fasting, compulsive exercise, fad diets, or even purging are just a few of the unhealthy ways many of them try to lose weight. Share. To be honest, it can feel like teens don't really want to talk about personal subjects like this. Among elementary school girls, 40 to 60 percent are concerned about their weight … Photo: iStock . There is a right and wrong way to talk to your teen. However, your daughter is aware she's put on a lot of weight. Avoid talking about your own body in a derogatory way. By Kathryn Westcott BBC News Magazine. Respect your teen's accomplishments, and support his or her goals. My teenage daughter has become angry, rude and distant . Your daughter's menstrual periods stop. Children up to the age of 7 have little direct control over what they eat and how they spend their time. And this is precisely what Michelle … She is secretive or defensive about dieting. How your teenager thinks and feels about themselves stems in part from how her parents and friends see them (or their perception of that). How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: Don't talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works. Really talk to her. If your daughter is overweight, discuss strategies she can use to lose weight. Foster self-esteem. Talk to your best friend. It could even be damaging. Teenage girls have a way of getting under one’s skin—especially when you’re their parent. She may experience feelings of self-consciousnesses and ridicule from her peers, and she may not know what she needs to do to lose the extra pounds. While we have had all the talks about her changing body and women's health, now that she is older there are more topics to discuss. Her teenage daughter wanted to wear one. … And for the record, if the pediatrician isn’t worried, you shouldn’t be either. And if you get into a situation where your mental preparation eludes you, listen to your gut. Parents often talk about how tough it is to talk to teenagers, how their kids won’t say anything or listen to them. Published 7 June 2013. Be there to listen when they need to talk without lecturing or trying to fix the problem. How to talk to your teen about weight: Don't. How to Talk to Your Teenage Daughter About Women's Health Tweet. Rather than behaving civilly by holding a door open for her… Your child's weight can be managed by controlling their access to sugary and fatty foods and making sure there is plenty of opportunity to be active. We're all familiar with the saying "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." Remember that the most important person here is you and the most important voice is your own. Here are some things you can say instead. NEDA’s Parent Toolkit - Learn about eating disorder myths, treatment and insurance information, and how to support a loved one in recovery. When it comes to food choices and weight, few of us are comfortable talking. Don't say anything if she's gained weight. Teens are at an especially high-risk of taking dangerous measures to lose weight. Talk to your daughter about her intelligence, wit, interests, kindness, compassion, warmth. What Is Weight … The less we say the more able they are able to listen. My teenage daughter has put on a lot of weight and I'm worried that it's going to make her unhappy. By Heidi Stevens. Whether or not you want to talk in detail to your child about weight might depend on what you expect them to do about it. How to Talk to Your Daughter About an Eating Disorder. I am the mother of a 16-year-old daughter. … Should your daughter complain that it's unfair that girls have dress codes and boys don't, you can agree, and introduce the concept of a double-standard. Do not express a desire to lose weight in front of them or talk about the diet you are on. As a parent, you want nothing more than happiness and health for your teen. Challenging the beliefs they bring to why they are overeating or avoiding food are best handled with a light touch. Encourage her to share her emotions without judging her so she’ll be more comfortable telling you things in the future. Teens need … It's important for you to really talk with your daughter in order to understand her. Again, a better approach would be to emphasize nutrition and exercise and lead by example. For years, the teenage girl endured soul-crushing abuse from schoolmates, strangers and even her family because of her weight. The more you accept your teen for who they are, the more they will be able to accept themselves. Her friends express concern. Placing myself in your daughters spot I wouldnt want to hear the word fat. She knows it every time she reaches for an article of clothing to wear that doesn't fit anymore. Decouple healthy diets and exercise from weight loss or body-image related goals. Aug 23, 2016 at 12:22 PM . Ask for your teen’s opinion. Your child successfully meets her weight goal but then keeps upping the goal. My friend wasn’t sure whether to let her. Don't make or allow hurtful nicknames, comments or jokes based on a person's physical characteristics, weight or body shape. Being a good parent for your teenage daughter is about getting to know her and encouraging her to make wise decisions. Build your teen’s self-esteem and self-respect. By Evelyn Resh . I feel almost bereaved. close. Copy link. Let’s take a typical scenario: You want to talk to your teenage son about his “irresponsible” behavior (maybe it’s playing too many games, not doing his homework or neglecting his chores). Though you can start by asking how her day at school was, don't stop there. Provide lots of healthy food options in your home. Take time out of each day to talk to your daughter so you can keep up with how she’s feeling and what’s important to her. I try to talk to her and show affection but she pushes me away. Listen when your teen speaks. In addition, you as her parent have the first hand in the foods she eats. Now, if your daughter is asking your opinion about her weight, she maybe wanting to open up. Your daughter will seem very mature one day and then silly and giggly the next. My friend wasn’t sure whether to let her. More is always less with teenagers. Listening rather than telling is crucial and reassuring. Even if your daughter needs to lose weight, it’s best if the pediatrician breaks the news rather than her hearing it in the form of constant nagging by a parent. When fitness is fun it becomes a desire rather than a chore. Not her body. It can feel as if you’re walking on eggshells—on one hand you want to address the problem, and on the other, you fear that you could say the wrong thing and exacerbate it. You could answer by saying "I think you are fine, but its not a bad thing if you want to lose a little weight". But as much as we want to connect, we don’t want to be their buddy. Girls with eating disorders have a distorted body image and continue to feel fat even when their friends don't share that view. 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